Thursday, January 21, 2010

Fergus goes shopping - emerges with hacksaw

Ha! I can see from the twinkle in your eye and sentimental countenance that you've been seduced by the woman's - my future bride's - talk of all things wedding. Well, if you've wondered what happened to all the grey sand, construction dust and fit foreign workers, wonder no more, for we have but scratched its surface.

Yes, for it was one of the 17th century philosophers who said "Renovation is for wimps, but DIY, the yardstick of a man". And with that dubious maxim out of the way, let us rummage through my eco-friendly shopping bag and see what grisly things the bear brought in.

3 paint rollers
2 roller handles
1 extendable pole
1 one-inch paintbrush
1 two-inch paintbrush
1 paint-mixing tray
1 hacksaw
1 extra blade for hacksaw
1 tub of wall filler
2 sheets of sandpaper
1 L ruler
2 pairs of gardening gloves
10 x 1.4 meters of plastic sheet

There - that just made me feel so man, my shirt ripped involuntarily and my chest grew hair.

Of course, you're thinking that this Fergus chap is a really daft stud, cos he's forgotten the most important ingredient of them all - the paint. Aha. I haven't forgotten about the paint. I just haven't decided which tone of white to buy. And though Athalia has less of an opinion than I do on the different hues of white, I'll be hauling her out nonetheless this weekend to shop for white paint, if only for the appearance of democracy, or my name shall not be Fergus Ong, Defender of Democratic Processes, Purveyor of Equal Rights Among Soon-To-Be-Married Home Reconstructionists.

Athalia: But you don't even believe in democracy.
Fergus: Hmmm...
Athalia: You're a communist. You carry a Cultural Revolution bag.
Fergus: That's more to do with vanity than politics, but you're right.
Athalia: Your decision on what tone of white to buy should be pushed through by sheer force of political will.
Fergus: True.
Athalia: Was it not Mao himself who said that such power ought to come from the barrel of a gun?
Fergus: You are so hot right now, seriously.
Athalia: Why thank you.
Fergus: You're welcome.

So, as you can see, great days loom ahead for our ragtag home, with eager hands and a bit more free time carving up some room in our lives to get back into housework again. Onwards, march!

6 comments:

Jeanie said...

Hey, Mr. DIY, you forgot to buy a cap. Oops, 2 caps ! Guess a Mao cap could fit the occasion better. Anyway, there aren't any anti-paint shampoos in the market yet so watch out for those ceiling drips. Gosh, floorboards and dripping paint - that's a lot of hard work. Sure you both can handle ah?

Athalia, The reality is starting to kick in!
You. Are. Getting. Married. And you will get a nice wedding.

Come to think of it, the eldest in the Ong family married a Lee and now, the youngest in the Ong family is also marrying a Lee ! Talk about compatibility !

Athalia said...

Oooh I never thought of that! Such a nice pattern there :)

Fergus, you are an idiot for making me say that on our blog.

I WILL TAKE REVENGE!!!!!!

Unknown said...

I am the father of all DYI...now retired..heheheheheh

Athalia said...

Like father, like daughter. Hmmm, lets try and coax you out of retirement!

Jeanie said...

Fishing for some help, Athalia? Hahaa!

Athalia said...

Haha, maybe, but more of I think my mom has projects around the house she wants done, and I'd rather she get my dad to do them instead of me!

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